Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Randomize
