walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Randomize
