It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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