careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Randomize
