I hate all girls vehemently.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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