If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
where am i from again
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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