who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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