I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
