Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
