I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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