soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
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