I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
