Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize