it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
