Those balls look pretty dangerous.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize