I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
