I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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