I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Randomize
