okay pat passed out under dana's car
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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