Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Randomize
