Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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