Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Randomize