So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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