You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize