im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
