What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
