Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Randomize
