Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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