I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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