Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
