Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
What a dumb baby whore.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
