Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Randomize
