The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
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