yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize