I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
