Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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