I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Randomize
