I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
