no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
