Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
