we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
wanna go halves on a baby?
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Use "feeling words"
Yay
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
