I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
