that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
im calling her cock vulture from now on
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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