What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
