had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
