now i know why i became what i already was.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
