hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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