That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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