Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
