they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
