so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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